Books: The Alchemaster's Apprentice

The Alchemaster's Apprentice

Author: Walter Moers

Success! I have now read all but one of Walter Moers wildly imaginative jaunts in Zamonia, and it was a classic. In short, Echo is a Crat (yes, Crat) who, when faced with starvation, strikes up a bargain with a dangerous and sinister Alchemist called Ghoolion; in exchange for abundant and extravagant food and lodging, at the next full moon Echo must be boiled down for his fat. Of course.

The book is, of course, brimming with Moers' brand of description which so seamlessly blends scientific facts and completely imaginary nonsense. The Alchemaster treats the crat to the most wonderful array of the world's cuisine, as well as providing Echo with some out-of-body experiences under the influence of some rather powerful potions. Though the book seems to trundle along, taking in the sights and sounds of the Alchemaster's laboratory, the threads are gently being woven together and the final climactic scene is quite spectacular.

City of Dreaming Books is still my favourite Zamonian tale so far, but this one is pretty close. Funny, intruiging and mind-boggling bizarre, there really is no other storyteller like Moers.

My rating: **** 4/5 stars

Recommendation: As a stand alone this is a great book, not mentioning too much of Zamonia's other stories and anecdotes. Definately start with Captain Bluebear if you want to get stuck into this guy's writing.

Books: The Twilight Saga

The Twilight Saga by Stephanie Meyers; Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn
Okay, I'm feeling sheepish. The bandwagon definately passed me by, it's passengers waving and hollering in a cloud of dust. Twilight simply did not exist for me until a few months ago.

I have just finished reading the final book in the Twilight Saga. I am completely sold.

I could write a review of each separate book, because, like most Twi-fans, I have my favourites. But instead I've decided to give you a brief rundown and then let you go discover them for yourself. Feel free to check back and let me know which book you liked best!

Likened to a modern Romeo and Juliet story, the Twilight saga basically centres around two teenagers who fall in love, despite the fact that one is a human and the other a vampire. Of course, their relationship quickly becomes the catalyst for a lot of tricky situations, including the restoration of several age-old legends, truces and rivalries.

Bella Swan moves to the small, rainy town of Forks, Washington to live with her dad. Life is dull an repetitive until she encounters the Cullen family. It takes little time for Bella, to realise there is something different abouth this family and, as Edward swoops in to save her from a car accident, their lives become unavoidably linked. Bella starts to put together the pieces; stunning beauty, impossible strength and speed, ice-cold skin. A book of Quileute legends hands her the only possible explanation - he is a vampire. Bella is single-minded in her love for Edward, however, and can't begin to imagine life without him. So, despite his craving for her blood, and the scathing looks from his siblings, Edward and Bella stay together.

Lucky for Bella, the Cullens are a family of "vegetarian" vampires, choosing to feed only on the blood of animals rather than humans. While Rosalie takes an almost instant disliking to Bella, the others, Emmet, Jasper and Alice, all seem very welcoming. However, with Bella, a human, knowing about the Cullen's secret, it is hard for them to stay protected for long. Throughout the saga, they have to take on various formidable foes including expert tracker vampires and ancient and powerful vampire royalty, The Volturi.

Throughout the saga, Bella's close friendship with her best friend Jacob is also put to the test, particularly when he begins to turn into a werewolf. You'd think Bella could handle another dose of the fantasy world, but it's complicated. Werewolves happen to be the sworn enemies of the vampires, and will die to protect the people of Forks from the Cullens. Of course, Bella's new 'family' have no intention of hurting any people in Forks, but their regular brushes with the darker side of vampirism even begin to throw a strain on that.

A brief not about book two, New Moon; imagine a 500 page transcript of a teenage hissy fit. It's redeeming feature is the introduction of the werewolves. Read it and move on!

Book three, Eclipse, is my hands down favourite. This is mainly because we get to see a lot more of the Cullen family (I'd join them at the drop of a hat!). The werewolf situation is fully developed and we now have a pack of at least 6 ready to defend the humans. Age-old truces and animosity however become faded and blurred when Jacob's love for Bella and the threat of a coven of vicious and bloodthirsty 'newborn' vampires see the old enemies finally and reluctantly united.

The stories are almost entirely written from Bella's PoV which is just as well, as Edward can read minds and that would make for tricky reading. However, this does occasionally border on clumsy as she dedicates pages to the powerful beauty of Edward Cullen. I can forgive this though as Meyers allows conversations to run just as they would in life, and makes great effort to bulk out the characters and their motivations throughout the series. Because of this, the characters are very 3 dimensional and you become quite easily attached. Which probably explains the insane levels of fan-dom which accompany the books and now film franchise.

It is as simple as this. Mom's love Twilight because it is about abstinence. Girls love Twilight because Edward is basically the most perfect, polite, caring, protective man ever. Boys love Twilight because it is full of action, vampires and werewolves.

Rating: Twilight - ***** 5/5 stars
New Moon **** 4/5 stars
Eclipse ***** 5/5 stars
Breaking Dawn **** 4/5 stars
Other books by the author: The Host
Recommendation: You may need to clear your diary because if you're anything like me, these bookds will have you hooked. Don't do any internet research before reading - there's a lot out there and spoilers will ruin it and make you sad!

Books: The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear

The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear - Walter Moers

I don't even know where to begin with this book. It is like a humungous sardine tin rammed full of literary genres, crazy characters, emotions and wonderfully surreal illustrations.

Translated from the orginal German, this is a fantastical tale of Captain Bluebear, a furry blue bear (keep up!) with 27 lives in total. We are witness to just 13 1/2 of these lives in this book. The story takes place in the curious imagined world of Zamonia, where a blue bear can stow-away with a band of MiniPirates, strange creatures dwell in the Demerara Desert and wizened old men live in the eye of a tornado. It is sci-fi, fantasy, adventure, comedy, children's book, fairytale. It is simply brilliant!

Each of Bluebear's 'lives' could stand alone as an individual story but it is not until the final few chapters of the 704 page tome, that you realise the threads have all been leading towards the ending. Characters that you had forgotten 400 pages ago suddenly reappear to the aid, and occasionally chagrin, of the protagonist. The entire text is broken up at intervals by the Professor Nightingale's Encyclopedia of Zamonia which, at first, makes for slow reading. You get used to this, however, and soon find yourself waiting for the next information download from Bluebear's teacher. Moer's sensational writing is complemented and added to by his completely surreal illustrations throughout the text. If you are left with any doubt after his introductionof a new character or setting, the accompanying illustration will make it almost jump off the page.

Do not be put off by the size of this book. It is a world waiting to be delved into, and does not disappoint. There are some truly inspired characters and situations portrayed in the book, and some very definate laugh-out-loud moments.

My rating: ***** 5 stars
Recommendation: Try not to put this book down between reads. Get stuck in and refuse to come out!
Other books by the author: Rumo, The City of Dreaming Books, The Alchemaster's Apprentice, A Wild Ride Through the Night

Films: The Golden Compass

The Golden Compass (2007)

Dir. Chris Weitz
Cast: Daniel Craig, Nicole Kidman, Dakota Blue Richards, Freddie Highmore, Ben Walker, Sir Ian McKellan...

Imagine a world where people walk around followed by their souls in the form of an animal, where The North is a land of struggle, violence and mystery, and where adults begrudge the tendency of all children to get themselves covered in dust. Hang on, isn't this meant to be fantasy?

Philip Pullman's weird and wonderful story is brought the screen in this huge, visually enchanting movie. I was blown away by the visual effects, the scenery, the voice talent of the non-human characters, and even the movie debut of Dakota Blue Richards who plays lead character Lyra.

Lyra escapes the drudgery of her 'Uncle's' college when she is whisked away to assist the seductive Mrs Coulter (Kidman). The trip turns sour, however, when Lyra realises that Coulter is up to not good, and in charge of a thuggish group known as the Gobblers. Lyra has been given the last existing Golden Compass and soon finds that people will stop at nothing to get hold of it. The compass tells the truth to the person who can read it. Lyra and her demon (soul), Pan, journey to The North, enlisting the help of the Gyptians, families of children who have been taken by the Gobblers, and a huge armoured polar bear (voiced marvellously by McKellan). It is an adventure of the most exciting kind, where, of course, the good guys always triumph. However, the film ends on a cliff hanger, enticing audiences to sign up for the subsequent two films that will make up the trilogy.

A handful of stunning perfomances and even more stunning visual effects all add to this enchanting film. If you can get past the jargon which is used from the outset, assuming that we have all read the books and completely understand terms such as 'The Magisterium', 'Demons' and 'the Dust'. The world which is created is completely fantastical but strangely believable as the relationships between characters and Lyra's journey to save her friends are genuine.

My rating *** 3/5 stars
Recommendation: If you fancy escaping to a complete fantasy, you will enjoy this film. Forgive the oversuse of bizarre vocabulary and get involved! Not enough Daniel Craig for me, but I'm looking forward to the 2nd film!